Currently

Reading ... through the book of Acts in the Bible, as well as a few Psalms.

I don't have a fiction book going at the moment, but in nonfiction I'm really liking You Who: Why You Matter and How to Deal With It by Rachel Jankovic.  Besides it I have a stack of Taste of Home cookbooks that I'm looking at, choosing recipes, and creating menus and shopping lists. I love how every recipe I have ever tried from Taste of Home has always turned out well. They may not be the trendiest, but they're delicious!

Listening ... to the sound of an exuberantly happy bird singing in the tree here in front of the house. Sharon and Steven chattering away as they make the beds in the boys' room. The soft hum of the refrigerator in the kitchen. And the loud ticking of the clock on the wall next to me.

Watching ... not exactly watching, but I am glancing out the window every so often to see the progress that is being made on tearing out the fence around the cow pasture. A new one will replace it, but right now I'm liking how things look without a fence.

Cooking ... for supper tonight I'm planning to have Mexican rice and enchiladas. It's a family favorite that I like making several times a month, and today feels like the right time.

Cleaning ... other than the daily dozen, we're adding in a bigger task or two each day. Today that happens to be wiping the baseboards on the main level of the house and washing the windows.

Playing ... Lumberjack. It's Steven's favorite game and he requests it every day. We don't play it quite every day, but that doesn't keep him from suggesting it hopefully every evening.

Loving ... the weather we're having. We finally had a nice soaking rain, and now the skies are blue, the air is crisp, and the sun is shining brightly. Combining it with colorful red, orange, and yellow leaves, is it any wonder that I love fall so much?!

Disliking ... this cold virus thing we picked up somewhere. Sharon was determined she is not going to get it, and managed to avoid it for a week, but she has joined the rest of us now with all the coughing, sneezing, sore throat wonder that this virus provides.

Crafting ... Steven has been cutting up empty cardboard boxes to build himself a hot-wheel track for his cars. It's messy ... and totally fits my blog name.

Anniversary Memories

    Today marks the one year anniversary of when we said our final good-byes to Mahlon. I won't remember every little detail of his day, but some moments were so vivid that I'll carry them with me for always.
     It was a dreary day. The weather seemed to match our emotions. I asked God for a rainbow, but the sky remained gray.
     I'll always remember the shoes. Hundreds and hundreds of shoes. I couldn't make myself look up to see who the people were who were walking by to say their final farewell. The shoes kept marching by. Big shoes, little shoes, shiny new shoes, old cracked shoes, wide shoes, narrow shoes, dusty shoes, plain shoes, Sunday shoes with their embossed designs on their toes, ugly shoes, pretty shoes. Shoes, shoes, shoes marching by in a solemn line.
     I'll never forget the sight of my four remaining brothers taking a turn together to gently fill the grave. It was the final activity the five brothers would ever get to do together
     I'll cherish the memory of how David and I remained behind when the crowd left to go back to eat lunch. The Amish part of the funeral was now over. We played some music for him, and finally we too had to leave. It still doesn't feel right or real that the three of us ex-Amish are now only two.
     Everyone was almost done eating by the time we got back to Dad's house. The afternoon passed in a blur of people wanting to talk.
     We left early that evening for our long drive home. In the middle of the night we stopped at a rest area. I broke down crying again, asking God why this all had to happen, and why He didn't give me the rainbow I had so wanted. It wouldn't have had to be spectacular, any little rainbow would have been fine. I tried to pull myself together and went out to where the rest of the family was waiting for me. On our way out of the building Kenneth stopped by a vending machine. I didn't pay any attention to that until he turned and gave me a pack of Skittles. I looked at it and had to pause for a moment. There was my rainbow.
     These past few days over this four day anniversary I've had little rainbows pop up in unexpected places. On my lap as LV and I were driving down the road, on the floor in our laundry room, as well as other spots where I have never seen rainbows before. I'm finding them to be so comforting.
     Though I miss Mahlon so much, I can still say, "God is good all the time!"

September

   If I were a turtle I would have tucked myself inside my shell. If I were a hermit I would have retreated further. If I were able to hibernate I would have started a little earlier this year. If I were a blogger (Oh wait ... I guess that is me.) I may have become silent for a while.
    September hit me hard this year. I wasn't quite expecting it for some reason, and so I've been retreating. I've been spending a lot of time outdoors hiking, enjoying nature, and simply soaking up the feeling of calmness, peace, and the presence of God. I know He is with me where ever I go, but being outdoors makes it feel even more real.
     On Sunday it will be the one year anniversary of my brother Mahlon's untimely death. These days leading up to it are feeling a bit overwhelming at times, and so I read the Psalms, listen to uplifting music, and retreat from the noise of life.
     I'll be back to regular blogging in October, but for right now I need a moment.

Currently

Reading ... I'm reading John in the Bible, and adding in a chapter or two of Psalms every morning as well. I find the Psalms so encouraging and soothing. They become more and more precious to me.

In fiction, the Anne of Green Gables series has still not been completed though I started a while ago already. I also have Garlic and Sapphires here waiting to be read again. I loved it the first time I read it, and am looking forward to enjoying it again.

In non fiction I read Life Changing Manga of Tidying Up last evening. (Basically the graphic novel version of cleaning Konmari style) It was weird. If it had not been a super fast read I would not have finished the book. I won't be thanking inanimate objects, clapping at books to wake them up, or sprinkling salt in bags. I also won't be recommending the book to anyone else. Like I said ... weird!!!

Watching ... The gentle mizzle outside the window and the steady drip drip of water from the small leak in the gutter along the front porch roof.

Listening ... to the sweet chimes of the wind chimes outside my window as they sway to the movement of the gentle East wind this morning.

Cooking ... last evening I made barbeque pulled pork sandwiches, only I used the left over beef roast instead of pork to make it. It turned out quite tasty,which say something since I don't usually care for beef.

Cleaning ... nothing that exciting. I cleaned the refrigerator out yesterday. I try to do it every week to keep it from getting to be a big project. Something had spilled so it took a little more effort than usual to clean it.

Wearing ... a mint green dress. I look as if I'd be ready to celebrate Easter.

Playing ... we played Hoagie, In a Pickle, and Fruit Punch yesterday. Each happens to be fun, fast, and don't require a lot of strategy. Sometimes it's fun to simply play for fun!

Jumping to Conclusions

    When a child is hurt because of someone jumping to conclusions and judging them before hearing the entire story you hurt for them and then share your own experience of having been judged wrongfully.
    The child's story is not mine to share, but I can share a few of my own. I find having experienced these makes me want to hesitate before being so quick to jump to conclusions.

Story 1

    Every year Dad would get a huge pile of firewood from Grandpa's sawmill. We would unload it at home and then allow it to season for a year before moving it into our woodshed the following fall.
    One fall we had moved most of the previous year's firewood into the woodshed, but there were still quite a bit of pieces half way buried in dirt and fragments of decomposing bark.
    Dad had asked me to dig out those pieces yet and move them inside. My two youngest brothers followed me everywhere and naturally they accompanied me outside to help. I squatted down and dug out the pieces and they would stack them on the wagon and once it was filled we would take it to the woodshed to unload it.
     Dad had some errands to run and had called a driver to take him where he needed to go. The driver arrived and had to wait a few minutes until Dad was ready to leave. I kept on digging out stray pieces of firewood and Ivan and Raymond were still happily stacking any piece I unearthed onto the wagon.
     Dad left to take care of his errands, and when he came home he unloaded everything while the driver waited. I was still working on the firewood project. When the driver was ready to leave he stopped next to where I was digging out another piece of wood, and gave me a piece of his mind about how disgusted he was that I was so lazy that I would just sit there and have my little brothers do all the work.
     I simply gaped at him and before I could find words again he had driven off.

Story 2

    With Mom busy with customers most of the time, I was the main caretaker of my youngest siblings. I was sixteen when Raymond was born and he was by my side constantly. 
     One day I was working in the garden with Raymond toddling around near me trying to help or picking up little rocks to play with when an older "English" pastor stopped in.
     He saw me in the garden and came over to talk a little before heading to the woodworking shop where Dad was busy making chairs.
     Raymond wasn't too fond of strangers and clung to the skirt of my dress. I scooped him up and stood there holding him as we talked.
     The pastor proceeded to tell me how disappointed he was to see even the Amish have unwed mothers, but assured me God could forgive my sins and still use the little guy for His glory. He then marched off to find my Dad and then it dawned on me he thought my brother was my son.

~~~~~

These two examples serve as a good reminder why I think it's important to understand situations before being so fast to think the worst of someone.