The snow while lovely to play in or look at from the warmth of our home is a little different when I have to be out and about.
I just got home from running some errands. It started snowing earlier today and the roads were getting decidedly more adventuresome by the time I got back home. There was a moment when I thought I'm going to head for the ditch, but somehow I was able to avoid that unwanted visit. It did get my heart rate up quite a bit though.
Hank the snowman is still standing guard in our yard, though he has become quite a bit shorter.
Being able to see the delight and wonder of the season through a child's eyes has been extra special to me this year.
The season feels different though. On one hand I'm enjoying getting all those fun season-y feelings, and on the other hand I almost feel guilty for feeling those Christmas-y wintery feelings.
Grief is such a … weird?? … (don't know what word I'm looking for here) thing.
It's easy to say "don't feel guilty." But lots harder to do. Still, I'm glad that bit of joy is creeping back into your world. (And I adore Hank -- no matter how tall or short he is or becomes!)
ReplyDeleteHank is still looking handsome. And my prayers are with you through this holiday season. I know from experience how difficult it is. I remember feeling so guilty whenever I would find myself being willing happy about something. You just have to give yourself plenty of grace my dear friend. Blessings always, Betsy
ReplyDeleteIt's bound to be a difficult Christmas, this first one after your brother's passing. You're doing your best and making the Christmas season full of good memories for the children. It WILL get easier.
ReplyDeleteI love the snowman! Christmas will have its ups and downs this year, I am sure. Prayers for your family during this time.
ReplyDeleteI know that guilt. It's not fun. Prayers for God's love and peace and comfort for you. God bless. 💛
ReplyDeleteI know what you mean about grief and guilt and enjoying ourselves and embracing celebrating at Christmas or at any time. This is my third Christmas as a widow and I focus on all the blessings all around me.
ReplyDeleteThe tree with buddy is such a nice picture! Grief has weird timing (been there). It will come and go for a while and that is how it just is. Your brother would want you to be happy during this season as he probably already knew how much you love this time of year. Maybe doing something in his memory this Christmas might keep you connected with him and allow you to keep grieving. You can use your grief and creativity for something wonderful. Or you can just be and that's ok too. Snowmen shrink and seasons change but memories are forever.
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