Thursday, April 8, 2010

A Knock on the Door

Recently there seems to have been a lot of people dropping by unannounced. My heart does weird things as I make a helpless sweep with my eyes over the rooms I pass through to get to the door to see who is there. I find it rather strange how a room that seemed happy and comfortable mere seconds earlier suddenly looks glaringly cluttered.

It is rather interesting to see what the people standing on the other side of the door want. There will be the occasional salesman which until recently I was always able to firmly and kindly send them on their way. The Gourmet Foods salesman was successful only because he spread all his wares out on the front yard and I was really hungry. Next time that won't work though.

I discovered yesterday it isn't safe to wash my hair in the middle of the day. The results of stepping outside with long wet hair on a very windy day isn't pretty. The amusement on the face of the person who had stopped by with several questions didn't help.

But there is one knock that I answered that I will probably remember for years because it was so different from any others I had ever experienced.

I opened the door to find a short man wearing glasses standing there with his hand raised ready to knock again. He quickly lowered his hand and in answer to my Hello asked. "Ma'am have you planned your funeral already?"  It took every fiber in my being to keep me from slamming the door right in his face. He must have noticed that he gave me quite a stir, because he added that he works at the local funeral home and he was wondering if we already have made funeral arrangements if we should happen to die. I told him I am really not in the postion to make those plans with him right now. He bobbed his head and stammered a little and then turned around and left.

I closed the door, and suddenly it all became so funny. The creepy little guy, his weird inquiry. I could hardly wait for my husband to get home to tell him about it.

And just incase you work at a funeral home that is looking for more business. It is not the best idea to have "Have you planned your funeral already" the first words out of your mouth when someone answers their door. You just might get hurt.


  1. HAHA. I wonder what he would have said if you asked if he knew how he'd spend eternity.

  2. Oh my goodness! How can people be so brave?!

  3. I would have been freaked out too. I just hope I'd see the funny side as quickly as you :)

  4. Long hair blowing in the wind is a crown of glory! I once heard a minister say that if Jesus had come in our day most women today would have to stand on their heads to dry his feet with their hair. It's such a shame - so many nice folks putting their own interpretation to God's Word!

  5. You should've told him no, but you were planning HIS in your head!! That's hilarious!!

  6. Hubby works at a funeral home. And trust me, he would not be safe if he came home one evening and casually asked me if I had planned my funeral (which by the way, we actually have already done). Wow. That guy had some nerve!

  7. Oh my...perhaps it is time for a "no soliciting" sign on your door.

  8. Maybe you could have said, No, have you planned yours? Never heard of door to door funeral salesmen!

  9. When hubby and I lived in the mobile home park we always had strange knocks at the door!

    There was the crazy lady from across the street who would ask to bum cigarettes even though we didn't smoke and then would ask to sit in our home until her mother came home.

    There was the cable guy who tried to sell us cable and instead I sold him onto Netflix!

    There was the crazy lady next door who would pound on our door at night screaming obscenities because I wasn't in any mood to talk to someone as irrational as she when I was cozily in bed.

    There was the short, fat fellow who demanded that I pay him $800 in vet bills because he accused my dog of attacking his dog. Hubby had taken our dog to a friend's house that day and I was able to keep my head and ask the fellow to describe my dog. He couldn't didn't get on description right. "He's a black and white pit bull with white ears," the man said. I countered with "No, SHE is a very bright brindle and white with black ears." He couldn't get the collar color right either...she had a very bright hot pink collar that isn't hard to miss. He also said that he kicked "him" HARD in the ribs to get her off his dog, but my dog showed absolutely NO signs of being kicked or harmed or in a scrap with another dog. He also said he was once a state trooper, but my state had a height requirement during the time he would have been a trooper and he wouldn't have made the cut. I'm only 5'2" and he was shorter than me! Finally, a neighbor came over and said she witnessed that my dog was never loose on the dates in question and he finally left.

    Now that we've moved out of the park and into the country we only get JW's once in a blue moon.

  10. My dear MIL told me the other day that Hubby and I should plan and pay for our funerals. I was so stunned I was speechless...a rare occasion! She's not even in the business!!!!

    Have a beautiful day filled with sunshinny blessings!!!

  11. I enjoyed this post and got a good laugh! I enjoyed the previous one as well with the poem. Your blog is a very restful and interesting place to read :)


  12. That made me laugh. I almost feel sorry for the poor guy - what a horrible job.

    You are much nicer than me. There have been times where I am not prepared to open the front door (like when I am still cleaning at noon in my pajama's) and so I have just quietly let the person at the door walk away.

    I figure if it is that important they can call me first :D

  13. LOL!! I would have been to surprised to say anything. What a opening greeting! That poor guy needs some lessons in salesmanship.

  14. Hello, I shall like a translator svp ca would be good!
    Best regards

  15. LOL!! This is why I don't answer knocks on my door unless they look distressed or it's a neighbor. They usually go away after 3 tries, lol.

  16. Hi! I agree with you all. We have a neighbor who makes me so nervous. He's an older man who bangs with all his might on the door. Living out in the country, you feel pretty vulnerable and he scared me!

    However, I do feel for the funeral guy. Having just finished taking care of my father and him passing on to be with the Lord, I can't tell you how grateful I was that Dad was not too squeamish to plan ahead. He had cancer and died at 66. We didn't enjoy the discussion of the arrangements, but we had it early on.

    When you get to be a certain age, this all becomes rather relevant I'm afraid.

    I always like to think that God is watching over our front door... but strangers can be nerve wracking!

  17. Yes I have learned not to run out bareheaded and hand something to my son as he is getting ready to head out. THAT is the EXACT time the farm workers choose to drive in!

  18. When my dad and mum returned to Baltimore from NC, he was already on dialysis. They both went to the local funeral home, made their plans, and started a payment schedule. You have NO idea how much easier it was when he died, and then several years late, mum passed on. The funniest thing was that Mum had selected the cheapest, ugliest coffin they had. The undertaker said he tried to talk her into something less garish - a giant pumpkin, he called it - but she insister "she wasn't taking it to Heaven with her, and nobody could see it six feet down". As it turned out, that model had been discontinued, but we both laughed about it, as if was so typical of my mother.


Thank you so much for taking time to comment. I love hearing your thoughts.